Ever the Reminders

Today, I sat on my favorite chair in the living room where the bird feeders are in my full view. As I sat reflecting on our Thanksgiving dinner last night, along came the reminder. A beautiful female cardinal appeared. She sat and finally positioned herself to look in through my window, it felt that she was just directly looking at me, I took her picture and was then inspired to write this post. It has been said that this is one of many signs from our loved ones in heaven, they appear when you need them most. I'll always miss my mother and with every special occasion, I'll always miss her more. But, I'm so thankful for the ever noticeable signs and signals to remind me that she will always be a part of my life even after life. Life after life.

Last night, Tanya, Steve, Caleb, Ryan, Shannon, Charlie, Daisy and Van and Doug were all here. An enjoyable evening. One grandchild missing but I was grateful that no photos were posted. I wish not to be exclusionary regarding our lovely and beautiful Emma. All of my grandchildren are equally important and loved. I do miss having her at family functions. This year, I did have a talk with Ryan about it as it just seems that it is the white elephant in the room. Everyone wonders about it but doesn't know what to say. I hope Emma will always know that she is every bit as special as every one of my grandchildren.  Ryan's words were, 'this is better for Emma'. So, I will not judge, not question and I will accept.

As time races through the seconds, hours, days, weeks, months, years, I am thankful for those special times we have.

Once a parent, always a parent, it is life-long. You never stop worrying about whether or not your kids and grandkids are happy, you look for constant signs, you long for their happiness now and always. Ryan, I hope you're happy. I wonder and look for the signs and sometimes I worry. Choose happiness.

And on this reflection - I merely have a reminder that we always savor those wonderful occasions where family comes together for the laughs, the meals that fill you up and then some, and the great chatter among everyone. And to those specials members who are now our special spirits, thank you for always making your signs so apparent to let us know you too are still here.

Random Thoughts this Mother's Day 2019

So here we are on Mother's Day 2019!! As I start this post and I'm certain that it won't be finished today. I shake my head and wonder.....ocould I really be any more negligent about this retirement blog of mine?! Seriously, my intentions were quite good when I started out.

Last night Ryan, Shannon, Charlie Daisy and Van came for a visit for Mother's Day. And, gave me with a beautiful blue Hydrangea. I had been reading about the blue Hydrangeas in particular and how their soil needed to be a little acidic or perhaps additional nutrients needed to be added. A little uncanny, here I am wondering about about these blue hydrangeas and in they walk in with one. It is beautiful. And of course we all know how I feel about blue.

Little Van is growing so long, if he was walking I would probably refer to him as tall. However, he spent a few hours on my lap and seemed to be quite content. The girls played with technology and it always amazes me that technology has replaced the toys the older generations grew up with. Good? Bad? Indifferent? We'll save that research for somebody else that wants to talk a lot.

5 years ago last week I lost my own mother, I never thought it would be this hard, it still feels like yesterday. As I sit here looking at Finn I can't help but think how much she would really enjoy him. Tanya and Steve took Caleb on a trip to Darien Lake this weekend and it's my first time dog sitting, Grand dog sitting. I'm pretty sure Canyon Steve feel that this may be their last annual track to Darien Lake, but who knows Caleb is 16 going on 21. Or so it would seem.

Fast Forward to June 3

When I started out to write this post, I never did think I'd finish in one setting. It seems that my writing is always for my freelance gig and not so much on the personal space.

So yesterday, off we go to golf for what I believe has become the annual tradition, a great bit of outdoor fun with my kids that involves golf! Great day, a bit windy but good outdoor fun! There we are, the 19th hole enjoying a beverage after a fun 18 holes. I'm sure at that point, I had no idea, I would come home and discover a deer tick embedded on my upper leg. So today and over the next 10 days or so, I'll observe and hope there are no nasty tell tale symptoms indicating Lyme's Disease. After all, 1 in for deer ticks are infected. Next time, I'll save the dreaded plucked out tick! Wait - skip the next time!!!

The dreaded tick bite! Still a bit of the head remains....

Thank you Tanya for the Funky Bird Feeder!

So glad you went to Darien, look what I scored??!!

What does a mom really want for mother's day? Happy Kids, Happy Grand Kids. In fact, it's not only what I want on Mother's Day, I want this every day. Today, like every day, I am indeed proud of who my kids have become.